A New Year . . . 2014

It's that time of year again. A year that brings singing, parties, new year kisses, reflecting on the year, making goals for the new one, and hoping for a better year than the previous one. I have come to love New Years; not because of a new years kiss or because of the parties or because of the singing. I have come to love it because I love looking back on the year and seeing all the people I've meet and how they've influenced me, I've begun to love to see how I've changed and all the trials I have experienced and been strengthened by. I love seeing if I actually accomplished my goals and making new ones just to see if I can do them. I just love seeing the progress of so many different things, especially when things have changed so much. So just a few of my favorite memories, not in any specific order.
1. Graduating from High School.
2. My 18th Birthday
3. Senior Prom
4. My first few days of being up in Rexburg
5. Seeing many of my friends getting mission calls
6. Dying my hair for the first time
7. Orchestra Tour
8. Heritage Tour
9. Seeing the Manti Pageant
10. Receiving emails and letters from missionaries
11. Christmas Day
12. Late night movies with Cedar
And last but not least number thirteen. I know it was last December but it is still one of my favorite memories, going ice skating for my Preference "day" date. :) I think this might always be one of my favorite memories oddly enough.
There are so many other things that have changed me. I've grown out of my shell quite a bit, I've grown closer to old friends, I've begun to figure out my life to some extent, I've done a few things out of the ordinary, and I've taken chances I never thought I would. I have changed so much and made so many memories with many different people. I have learned many things about myself. I have learned much about the Lord and his plan concerning me, although I still have much more to learn about all those things. Many things have changed, and I have changed as well. I will continue to change by the goals I shall set for myself. These goals are as follows:
1. Read 1000 pages
2. Travel to some where new
3. Run 1,760 miles on a treadmill or trail (The same distance from American Fork to New Orleans)
4. Save $50 in change (I'll see how much I can really save up)
5. Start to write a book-100 pages done (for some odd reason I've always wanted to write a book)
6. Write a letter or note to someone once a week
7. Go at least two weeks without sweets
8. Learn how to meditate and do it at least once a week
9. Go to a drive in movie
10. Learn 500 words in Spanish or another language (It helps when you have friends in Spanish Speaking missions)
11. Memorize a song on the piano
12. Memorize a piece on the cello
13. Take 3,000 Pictures.
14. Read the whole Book of Mormon
15. Find a Job
16. Try a new food
17. Volunteer (Somewhere else besides the AF Learning center)
18. Write 2-3 times a month on this blog.
19. Write in my journal at least 2-3 times a week.
Let's see if I can actually accomplish more than a few of them. I'm determined to finish all, but shall see. :)
Well that's it.

Happy New Year!!! I wish everyone a great year.

2014 here I come!!     

The Storm

College was great, grades good, roommates were fantastic, there were a few boys, laughing constantly, and a huge smile. Life was wonderful; the sun seemed to shine brighter than normal, nothing seemed to dampen my mood. I was extremely happy to be where I was; everything seemed almost too good to be true.
"It's the calm before the storm. I know something hard is around the corner." That's what I told my friend on the phone a little while ago. Little did I know that the storm that waited for me was a lot harder than I anticipated.
At first I was just frustrated, confused, and stressed. I was faced with a decision I thought I had already made and school was becoming a bit more stressful. I fought with myself everyday. Thinking about the things I was faced with, trying to make peace within myself and trying to figure out what exactly I should do. I couldn't work it out. I talked to one of my roommates about it, seeing if she had advice or any ideas to help me. she came up with the idea of having a priesthood blessing. She needed one too. So we both had one. It may have helped a little. then I turned to one of my best friends in South Carolina, Chandler. Chan pretty much made me the same promise that I got in the blessing - that I would have clarity. i sighed with frustration as tears came to my eyes. I was SO frustrated!!! I was having everything besides clarity.
As per usual things get worse before they get better. You have to fall before you are able to stand up stronger than before. And sometimes we may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I still may not see the full light, but I am starting to see a little flame. this is thanks to many people that the Lord has blessed me with. I've called my parents a few times crying and/or frustrated and they have put up with it. My sisters have given encouraging words and have helped me. My roommates are the sweetest. The other day I found a card on my bed. All of them had written a little note in it for me. I sat on my bed and cried; I was immensely touched by what they said. Then there's my dear friend at home who has also helped a lot and put up with my dramatics. Plus, I have the sweetest missionary ever, who, although he may not know exactly what I'm going through, still sends me encouraging words in his weekly email. So thank you Mom and dad. Thank you Sara and Rachel. Thank you Cedar, Kamila, Sariah, Katie, and Lindsay. Thank you Cambri. And thank you Elder Chandler Thomas Roetker, your weekly emails are such a blessing.